You know the song “Fire and Desire”, by Rick James, and others that composed the bunch. Well that’s what I woke up to. Not exactly the song itself, but rather, the sounds of fire entirely. Last night, I was looking at my ceiling while lying down. I thought to myself, “how do people fall asleep to noise”? White noise that is. While I can fall asleep to much worse, these were hard to do the job. So I turned on some sounds to get the sense of feeling. At first it was difficult. “Dark noise”? “Balancing noise”? I tossed and turned. Shuffled through the covers. Groaned. You can tell by now that I was having a hard time finding the “right” sound, let alone some shut-eye.

“Fire”. “Fire”? I clicked the option and there I was, laying down listening to incendiary. Not long after tuning out everything, I was asleep. Granted, I did wake up through the night to readjust myself…and turn the volume up from outside noises. But it felt…good. Am I a pyromaniac? Maybe….but not really. Is me listening to fire the oxymoron of my spirits damnation? I hope not, but so be it.

I fully woke up, and there that sound was still. Burning out the outside worlds noise and my dark thoughts. I envisioned myself sitting at the fire alone. Embracing the ember. Embracing the company it gave me while I made breakfast, and sat at the table. Still engulfing. Until it was time to put it out. Thank you, ember. I understand the feeling with these sounds. These elements. As I’m writing, my right hand is fidgeting uncontrollably. I think it’s from the smokes I’ve been puffing on recently. I wonder if it all ties into my sudden desire to end last night with a flame.